


Can't Keep Watching

by Aqualina_Sky



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Abuse, Angst with a Happy Ending, Domestic Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-10-20 10:07:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20673611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aqualina_Sky/pseuds/Aqualina_Sky
Summary: Matthew and Gilbert had been friends since forever. Matthew and Ivan had been dating for months. Things may not be quite what they seem.





	Can't Keep Watching

**Author's Note:**

> This is not a nice fic. Ivan is not a nice guy in this. I don't actually hate Ivan, I just had a plot bunny that got away from me. READ THE FUCKING TAGS BEFORE YOU READ THIS. THIS IS YOUR TRIGGER WARNING

Matthew and Gilbert had grown up together. Their parents were first generation immigrants, and had ended up bonding together over the difficulty of living in a completely new country without any outside help. Since they happened to be similar ages, only a few months apart, they had quickly become friends, bonding over mutual annoyance of their brothers. 

Somewhere along the way, Gilbert fell in love with Matthew. It hadn’t been intentional, he had hardly even noticed it happening. But happened it had. He tried to keep their interactions normal, tried to keep from showing it. And he was relatively successful, even going so far as to date here and there, spending a little time dating Eliza and Roderich, and dating Antonio for a little while before they broke up with the mutual understanding that they were meant to be only friends. 

It didn’t come to a head until college. Matthew and Gilbert ended up attending the same university, Matthew on a full hockey scholarship, Gilbert with a partial merit scholarship, studying psychology. That same year, Matthew started dating Ivan. 

At first, Ivan was all flowers and chocolate and soft touches with Matthew, who was so surprised at not being mistaken for his brother, or overlooked for his friends, that he never stopped to consider the fact that everyone warned him that Ivan was bad news. Especially Gilbert. Gilbert hated Ivan with everything he had. And that’s when Matthew finally noticed he was jealous. 

They fought about it. The biggest fight they had had in years, with yelling and slamming doors and endless silence. They didn’t speak a word to each other for two weeks, despite being roommates. Matthew stayed with Ivan, and Gilbert moped. But as all best friends do, they made up, Gilbert eventually showing up at Ivan’s house with apology ice cream. And they were good again. 

For months, it seemed as though Gilbert’s fears were unfounded. Ivan was great to Matthew, soft and kind to him. But then, Matthew showed up at the dorm with a black eye. He claimed it was an accident. Too much alcohol at a party, and someone mistaking him for someone else. Gilbert let it go without too much fuss. It wasn’t the first time such a thing had happened, and it wouldn’t be the last. Gilbert cleaned him up, and sent him to bed and let him act like nothing had happened. 

That was the end of it, or so Gilbert believed. Until finals week, when Matthew once more showed up. This time though, it was so much worse. He had a black eye, a broken nose, a split lip. And that’s just what Gilbert saw when he brought him in. Matthew’s hands had been shaking too bad to let himself into the room. 

Further assessment revealed bruised if not broken ribs, and bleeding from areas that honestly terrified Gilbert. He was also pretty sure Matthew had a concussion. 

Gilbert didn’t ask what happened. It was pretty obvious, and he would have gone to Ivan if Ivan hadn’t done it. That was how Matthew worked. Instead, he cleaned him up, sent him to bed, and watched over him all night, making sure he was recovering. He would wait for Matthew to calm down before he would ask. 

Matthew slept for almost a full day, before waking up groggy and disoriented. Gilbert was waiting for him with food and water, helping him to eat and drink before he asked. 

“Mattie, what happened?”

Matthew shut down at once, without even a hint of hesitation. “I fell down the stairs.”

Gilbert gritted his teeth, struggling to hold his temper in check at the defensiveness, especially when they both knew he was lying. “And they raped you?”

Matthew flushed darkly, clearly fighting not to react when he responded with, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

It was a futile protest, and they both knew it. Gilbert didn’t want to fight with him though. Instead, he shakes his head, standing back up. 

“I can’t make you leave him, Matthew. And I’m not going to try. But when you’re done being his punching bag, I’ll be here.” Before he left the bedroom, going to put up the dishes and leaving Matthew to stew. 

He heard Matthew get up and go shower, and when he came out to the kitchen, he was wearing one of Gilbert’s pairs of sweats and his usual Canadian flag hoodie, which he had left last time he spent the night, seeing as he had mentioned Ivan didn’t like it. 

Without saying anything, Gilbert hands over a protein shake, knowing Matthew will need his strength. Matthew took it silently, watching him. After a long moment he whispers, “I’m scared Gil. I don’t love him anymore, but I’m scared.”

“Matt, I’ve been in love without since we were fifteen years old. I’ll always be here for you. But I can’t keep watching this. He’s going to kill you one of these days. And there will be nothing I can do.”

“What?”

“What?”

“You’re in love with me?”

“Matthew Williams. You’re an idiot. I’ve been in love with you since we were kids. It’s why I never tried very hard at dating. I thought everyone knew.”

“I never knew.”

Gilbert shrugs softly. “Guess you do now.”

“Gilbert, I’ve loved you for years too. I didn’t realize you felt the same.” He says with a light flush. 

Gilbert grins, though it’s still soft and sad. “Guess we’re both a couple of Idioten then.”

“So what do we do now?”

“I don’t know, Mattie. I just don’t.”

***** Four months later *****

Months later found Matthew and Gilbert living together in an apartment on the other side of town an Ivan in jail, charged for 20 years, based on everything that could be proved to have transpired. Gilbert was interning with the psychiatrist at the local school district, working to identify psychological issues in children and teens, namely caused by abusive or neglectful parents. Matthew had signed onto a professional hockey league, after getting his bachelor's degree in ancient history. According to their brothers, they were disgustingly domestic, falling into a relationship easily, and with little awkwardness. There were nights in which Matthew would still wake up crying, and nights where Gilbert didn’t sleep, afraid Matthew wouldn’t be there when he woke up. But for the most part, they were the happiest they have ever been. 


End file.
